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I was having lunch with a friend of mine the other day. We were just chatting, having girl talk, when she began to tell me about some issues she and her guy friend were having. She went on to tell me how she is always there for him but when she needs him he is never around. She said that she cooks, cleans, and tries to be his superwoman but he doesn’t reciprocate. I gave her some advice and tried to comfort her as I could totally relate to what she was going through. My friend reminded me a lot of myself because I was once that person. My high school sweetheart and I were in a similar relationship for years. I tried to be the person I thought he wanted me to be because at the time I didn’t know myself. I didn’t know my worth or thought I was good enough, so I conformed hoping that he would love and appreciate me more.

To my surprise and disappointment, conforming didn’t work. No matter what I did for him, he was never satisfied. I would sacrifice the things I wanted just to please him yet, there was always a complaint. I would never receive a simple “thank you” or any form of gratitude from him. I finally had enough and I left without looking back. I prayed and asked to God to show me the error in my ways so that I wouldn’t repeat similar behavior in my next relationship. As I prayed for clarity, God began to speak and make things that were once cloudy, crystal clear. He said that I had made 2 major mistakes. The first mistake was that I gave my boyfriend privileges that should be reserved for my husband. The second mistake was that I cast my pearls before swine.

I totally understood the first mistake but was unclear as to what the 2nd mistake really meant. I’ve heard that passage of scripture for years, but didn’t have a true revelation. I researched and found it in the Bible. It’s found in Matthew 7:6 NKJV and it reads, “Do not give what is holy to the dogs; nor cast your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you to pieces”. Pearls in this passage is relating to something of value. Would you put your valuable pearls on a pig? I’m sure your response would be no! Truth is, we do it all the time. This is what happens when we give without reciprocation, go above and beyond, and break our backs to do for people who do not appreciate our efforts. Some people will never recognize or value who you are and what you do for them. So if you find yourself in this position, don’t be afraid to walk away. There’s no gain in giving to someone who takes you for granted. You’re far too beautiful and valuable to allow such behavior. A diamond is still a diamond, even if it is improperly appraised. So let your light shine in the direction of those who value you and appreciate what you have to offer.

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